Tag: are you fucking kidding me
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Realigning the Thought Tracks
There is some common wisdom shared among authors that has gotten twisted by the internets, like playing a game of operator/telephone (depending on where in the country you grew up–basically a message is relayed through a number of people and it warps with each passing). The very wise advice was, “Don’t quit your day job…
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Bordering on the Ridiculous
Sara Megibow posted recently that she “did her part to help Borders” by buying a book there. And all I can think is, you either screwed the publisher or screwed the author by buying there. If Borders doesn’t pay for the books it’s selling, someone has to take the loss. Either the publisher will take…
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Hurry Up, Technology!
I’ve made this complaint before, but we need those dream records they have in “Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within.” I had a sequel/continuation to a previous dream. Both of them were awesome. Both of them vanished from my brain the moment I woke up. I have little broken pieces, images mostly, floating around in my…
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No One Likes a Dumb Protagonist
The subject line says it all. No one likes a dumb protagonist. We accept flawed characters and we accept that situations can be shrouded in mystery or so layered that a character cannot comprehend it on spec. They need time to peel back the layers or let the whole thing soak in before it finally…
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The Roast Beef Sandwich…FROM HELL!
I held onto this comment because I wanted to maintain the positivity of Thanksgiving, my second-favorite holiday of the year. Five days later, it’s still such a wild ride that I’d feel horrible not sharing it with you. It is Wednesday evening, the night before Thanksgiving, and my wife has been preparing various foodstuffs for…
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Sticking It to the Predators
I want to query known predator agents so they’ll request my work. They’ll tell me they charge a reading fee because they’re so busy. I’ll respond that I charge a writing fee because I’m so busy. I will gladly pay their reading fee if they pay my writing fee. Bitches.
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Humility Has Its Limits
My routine on a writing week and a reading week are pretty similar. Spend an hour on the commuter rail either reading or writing. Spend 20 minutes on the subway reading. (Writing on the subway is very difficult, and I do it very infrequently). While I have a number of samples and one novel on…
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Ink Failure
Up until 2006, you could look at me while at work and never know that I had a tattoo. Of course, at that time, I had eight tattoos. The only one that was ever visible was the one on the back of my neck and only then if I wore a shirt without a collar.…